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Only 20,000 More Words To Go

Abigail, finally left to her own devices, was horrified to discover there wasn’t a single AA battery in her bungalow.

Question:

If a lady told you “Chupa mi huevos!” would you take that as an insult or an invitation?

Jihad: For What Is It Good?

If I opened up a small independent coffee shop, would you support it? And what if I called it the Jihad Cafe & Bagel Emporium? Then, would you still support it? Okay, what if I declared a holy war on the evil, capitalistic pigs of the Starbucks empire. How about then?

Don’t make me release the death squads on you; they don’t come cheap.

My WordPress Cherry…

…is now officially popped.

 

What? No cuddling?!

BECAUSE INQUIRING MINDS WANT TO KNOW…

or,

BECAUSE I BELIEVE THAT SOME OF YOU ACTUALLY GIVE A FLYING FUCK.

Hi. Happy New Year!

I’m finally getting around to writing this entry for one of my Xanga friends/subscribers, Automaton_Emotion. Basically, this is to bring all of you, particularly her, up to date on what’s been going on in my life. If you remember, I was working at the Japanese American National Museum. Just short of my ten-year anniversary of working there, I was unceremoniously let go, given the boot, handed my pink slip, laid off… Looking through my page, I think the last few entries mentions working at a flower shop. Well, I no longer work there. I DID go back during the holidays to help them out, but I’m no longer a regular employee of the shop.

Starting in July of last year, I began a new job (with health benefits!!) at a non-profit located in the Veterans’ Affairs complex over in West L.A. The H.R. manager used to be my wife’s boss, and he knew I was looking for work so he called me. Now usually, I wouldn’t want to commute 24 miles to West Los Angeles for a job that pays a little above minimum wage, but these were desperate times, and I needed the health benefits.

The non-profit where I work helps homeless veterans get back on their feet. The fact that this organization helps veterans was one of the reasons I wanted to work there. (There was a time in my life where I wanted to join the military, and I still have a strong interest in things military) In addition to being homeless, many of these veterans are also suffer from some type of substance abuse and/or PTSD. A few are court-ordered to be there, but a majority arrive on their own free will.

My position is driver/FSA (food service assistant) for the kitchen staff, and I work from Saturday through Wednesday, 7:00am to 3:30pm, and on Wednesdays I work from 6:00am to 2:30pm. My main responsibility is to go out in the catering truck, with one of the veterans, and pick up food donations- primarily bread- from our list of donors, which includes some markets and several Starbucks, along with a high-end cupcake bakery. This donation run is not a bad thing since it takes up half my day. By the time I come back to the “house”, it’s lunch time for me. Sometimes we pick up a shit load of stuff, and other times, almost nothing at all. 

My other main responsibility is to fill out the food order for these other two facilities located off-site: a women’s house and a house for Iraq veterans. For this task, I follow a menu, along with an order sheet and prepare their food order for the week. this part of the job is a pain. Everyone who’d had to fill the order for the Women’s and Iraqi houses hated it, and I am no different. a lot of it involves searching for food items in the walk-in freezer, which is cold as fuck. I had to buy gloves and a watch cap, because without those two items I could only stay in there for about two minutes tops. Another part of this job involves portioning out the ingredients, so I had to buy a cheap calculator. 

Other than those two parts of my job description, I’m supposed to help out the cooks whenever possible, mostly with prep work like cutting vegetables or whatever, and other miscellaneous tasks.

Before this position, I had never worked in a kitchen; hence, I was completely confused and lost. It was horrible. My only consolation was that I knew once I got a pattern down, everything would be okay, but until then, it would be horrible for me. Flash forward to today, and I’m pretty comfortable with fulfilling my job description. I also got a very nice evaluation at the end of my three-month probation.

So let me tell you one story: every Wednesday, we go pick up supplies from the Westside Food Bank. When I was being trained, we would routinely pick up and load more than a ton of stuff onto our catering truck. so, I go out on my first solo run with one fo the veterans and it’s to the food bank. We load up the truck with veggies, dry goods, and canned goods and return to the house. On my first day out, I get pulled over for driving an overloaded truck. How they could tell it was overloaded was anybody’s guess, but I had to follow the officer to a commercial scale and sure enough, the truck was overweight- by fifty freakin’ pounds. the gross weight of the truck was not to exceed 11,050 lbs. and we were at 11,100 lbs. goddamn freaked me out, as we aren’t to get moving violations nor get in any accidents. 

Luckily, the organization was cited instead of me, but it was unbelievable that we got cited for this, and our organization, ande our work, are very well known in this part of town, and my first day out I get popped. 

Because if this, we can only get up to 1,000 lbs. of goods, but it worked out since we’re trying to cut down on donations; sometime we get so much stuff it goes bad before we can use it, and a couple of stops basically give us trash. Like, produce that NOBODY can use.

Now, in my personal life, I got sick as fuck on Christmas. I got a flu shot several weeks ago, and started feeling out of it in the middle of December, but working in the rain didn’t help and I succumbed to something nasty, that totally kicked my ass. Today, I’m feeling a lot better; not 100%, but pretty close.

Okay, that’s it. I don’t know if I forgot anything. If I did, ask and I’ll try to answer without incriminating myself. Automaton_Emotion, I hope you’re happy now. I did this for you. Oh, okay, I did this for the rest of “you people”, too.

Stay Frosty, Beloved Readers! It may not seem like it, but I miss all of you very much. I’d blow you a kiss, but some of you might take it the wrong way.

 

Oh, screw it. >MUAH!<

 

Once Again…

What the hell is that thing on the bottom of the Xanga page? Fucking annoying!

Wow, seems like a lot has changed since I’ve gone. For one thing I’m a female now- border collie, that is. The herding instinct is taking some getting used to; being able to lick myself in places where I’ve only dreamed… well, you guys already know the answer to that one.

The major reason I’m posting this is that I’m thinking of returning to write on this thing-

*BLUE BALLS ALERT!*

-but only once in a while. Or, if I get a really good idea- none of this stream of consciousness shit. Oh, who am I kidding??

OH! Now I remember why I felt compelled to actually post something: I visited a few of you guys. You’ll probably see my name in your footprints. You’re gonna be a little creeped out, maybe even resentful. You don’t remember who I am. You guys used to fucking love me. LOVE ME! Or… at least think about me? Anyway, it’s me, KenWa. There! Conscience cleared (it’s small so it’s easy to maintain. Travel light, I always say!

My next post will, hopefully, offer more detail in the many changes my life has undergone- underwent? Anyway, I’m not the same person I used to be; yet, not much has changed.

In other words, I’m not a border collie, and I’m still guy. Oh, you peoples will believe everything I write on this thing. I fucking miss it!!

 

Hello

Hi. It’s been a long, long… long time.

I just wanted to get on this thing and wish all of my old Xanga friends a stress-free and healthful holiday. Personally, I was sick as fuck this holiday; this, despite getting my flu shot.

I think of you guys quite often. Silly, because I hardly know ye, but since I’m a lazy fuck and spend most of my time thinking of stupid updates for my Facebook page, I hardly- okay, NEVER go on Xanga. Plus, I don’t have this huge swath of time I can exploit to write posts. Those days are long gone.

Okay, I have to go to work now. I have to get to the Westside by 7:00am and it’s already 6:05. Hopefully I’ll make more time to get back onto this thing.

Well, awrighty! Hope all of you are doing well! 

Happy New Year!

 

PS, well, well, well… it seems that Safari and Xanga have managed to be good friends now. It’s about fucking time!!

 

 

 

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